Dallas Cowboys Investigative Report by Ugly Buzzard

Pic courtesy of dallasobserver.com

Before getting into the breaking news, does anyone know how to work on DVR’s? Every time I try to tape “The Biggest Loser” on NBC it keeps recording the Cowboys games!!!!

WTF’s up with that?

..BREAKING NEWS: Dallas Cowboys football practice was delayed nearly 2 hours today after an offensive player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field. Cowboys Head Coach Jason Garrett called Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, who immediately made the decision to suspend practice & call the Dallas Police & Federal Investigators from Homeland Security, the CDC and the FBI.

After a complete analysis by FBI forensic experts it was determined that the strange powdery white substance unknown to the Dallas players was in fact the GOAL LINE. Practice resumed after FBI Special Agents decided in a conference with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell that the Dallas team was highly unlikely to encounter the substance again this season.

Ugly Buzzard
RedskinsTailgate Editor


The Dallas Cowgirls contributed to this article.


3 thoughts on “Dallas Cowboys Investigative Report by Ugly Buzzard

  1. We will SWEEP ur Cowboys this season!!!wanna bet.You lose you will be wearing a B & G bikini and the whole world will see the pics.Now how confident are you?

  2. Ha ha, hi Cathy. We’re just having some light-hearted fun luv. By the way, thanks for bringing the laptop to the hospital for Len.

    Be sure and look after him as best you can for us. As far as the division games go, I’m not so sure about that. As Len is quick to point out, many games last season that the Skins lost were by a very slim margin.

    Much is said about preseason being a poor judge of a team, but that varies. I think it shows a big improvement in the Redskins depth. The Redskins won’t pull up last in the division this season, little buddy.

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